Welcome back to the Three Delivery Forum!
We're glad to see you again!

Please log in or register with us to continue.

Jake and Jingo - first original one shot

Go down

Jake and Jingo - first original one shot Empty Jake and Jingo - first original one shot

Post by WolfieStar on 9th October 2010, 9:51 pm


It really does stink XD and it's short. Just attempting to flow ideas while I distract myself from my report on the fourth dimension...and it creeps me out XD.


The sound of beer bottles clanking together and drunk men laughing was the perfect excuse for the shadow to slip inside. Her eyes flickered towards a girl wearing skimpy clothing leaning against the counter and clutching her own glass bottle filled with alcohol. She appeared to, and failing greatly, to ask the bartender on a date. The blonde hair bartender simply ignored her, and continued serving the other customers. His blue forelock bounced as he frantically tried to fulfill everyone’s orders for the drinks.

As light as a feather she tip toed across the room, the drunken customers not noticing her in the least. She got by easily, and pushed between the trampy girl and her enraged boyfriend. The glances of other people who weren’t drinking as much yet did not make her feel uncomfortable. She pulled the ripped fabric of her hood over her face, desperate to not seem out of place, though her short stature and young features gave it away.

“Hey.” her sharp voice rang out through the packed bar, bringing the young bartender’s attention to her. He blinked at her gruff tone, but then glared at her.

“Aren’t you a bit young to be in a bar missy?” his ice blue eyes seemed to stare into her soul. But she didn’t express fear of any kind. She sat up straight and stared back into his eyes, anger flaring up.

“Shut up and give me a freaking beer.”


“What the crap?”

“Show me an ID. You look very young, at least 18. Need to be 21 to be permitted in this bar lady.” he hissed, clutching the glass he was holding tightly. All he wanted to do was get out of work early. The annoyance flowed off of him in waves.

“I don’t have an ID.” she sneered. “Happy now?”

“Get out.” he growled at her, but lost his attention on her, now focusing his gaze onto the woman and his boyfriend. She was hysterically crying, the large man yelling at her, and shaking her violently. The bartender snarled and barked, “Stop that now!”

The young girl saw, and attempted to grab hold of one of the man’s large arms. He growled at her at swung his arm backwards to throw her off. But she held on tight, not even letting go when he slammed her against the chairs. The girl grimaced, but didn’t dare let go, for fear he would hurt the older female. Of course, she didn’t really care for others, but her actions were in the spur of the moment.

The man jerked as the bartender tackled the much larger fellow. He ripped the smaller girl off of his arm and yanked her away as they went into a full blown fist fight. Innocent bystanders jumped out of the way of the two brawling men.

The small girl who had come in the first place to steal watched carefully, then slipped behind the counter. Everyone was far too busy with the fight and argument to notice her, so she grabbed a few bottles of whiskey unseen. The sound of wood cracking assaulted her ear drums, and she looked around quickly to see the young bartender slammed against the counter top, now broken.

“You--” the stronger man snarled, yanking him back up by his collar, snarling in his face, “touch my girl and you’re dead.”

The much smaller one wiped his nose on the back of his hand, grimacing when he saw blood. “I wasn’t even interested in that slutty girlfriend. And I’ll say it again, leave the bar.”

He felt pain in his stomach as the pain punched him. The bardenter fell to his knees clutching his stomach and hissing with the pain. He saw out of the corner of his eye the man dragging his crying girlfriend out of the bar. Once he finally stood up and turned around, his eyes blazed in anger as he saw the girl grab the alcohol and bolt out of the bar.

“Stop! Thief!” he roared, chasing after her. The door slammed open, echoing through the night as he chased after her, already angry about the fight. There was no way he was getting off early now. Why did everything happen on his shift? It wasn’t that fair really.

The girl looked back quickly, gasping as she skirted behind an alleyway. She begged that he was disoriented after getting a bloody nose, but it seemed like a farfetched idea. Her cursing rang out as she slammed into a garbage can and was grabbed roughly by the bartender. His ice blue eyes stared coldly into her brown ones, showing no remorse of any kind. Before she could react he ripped the bottles away from her hands and glared even harder at her.

“How dare you!” he roared, snarling at her.

“I didn’t do anything!” she wailed. “I’m so thirsty, I need alcohol!”

“No one ‘needs’ alcohol.” he snorted. “Get out of here before I call the police.”

The two stared each other down, not letting the other move.




Jake and Jingo - first original one shot Jb7gxg

Posts : 626
Join date : 2010-05-07

Back to top Go down

Jake and Jingo - first original one shot Empty Re: Jake and Jingo - first original one shot

Post by DragonWarriorClaire34 on 13th January 2011, 8:04 am

Wow! This is really good! You can just feel the tension of the night...and the many things unexplained...

The ending threw me off. XD

Please continue it if you can...oh wait, is this a one-shot? XD

Posts : 336
Join date : 2010-05-06

Back to top Go down

Back to top

- Similar topics

Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum